The John Howard Memorial Cricket Tragic Thread (I)

In a mark of respect to our former PM, we will have a thread for each Ashes Test match. And I think that we need to have his bowling as a fitting start to the first test.

So let’s bring all the cricket chat into here.


84 Responses

  1. HR – still a draw?

  2. Certainly not John’s best ball but he did manage to line up his mate, W., with this perfect beam ball.

  3. LOL kyxzil… i love it…. even better than a shoe

  4. Joni, thanks for this. It is good to see a real Australian rather than the earwax chomper.

    Our current PM is not even here. He is overseas feathering his own nest. The worst thing is that the Australian people do not care. Who knows?? He could even be at Scores putting my hard earned tax dollars into the garters of strippers.

    As for the Ashes, we are not as good as we used to be. We are good but not great.

  5. Still gonna beat the Poms though.

  6. Wont something please happen!

  7. If nothing happens soon I will have to resort to music (Neil – warm up that guitar)

  8. Neil – warm up that guitar)”

    Don’t you mean the violin??? With sad music in the background???

    Perhaps your hero Mr Rudd could make an appearance at the Ashes and tell us how much he cares for people.

    At the moment it’s 3/174. We need Warne and McGrath. Without them we are good but not great.

  9. Yeah – just a bit dead at the moment.

    And Rudd’s not my hero…. just less hated than the previous PM.

    Oh – I meant Neil Diamond….

  10. It’s all your hero’s fault Neil:

    THE nation’s No.1 cricket tragic – former Prime Minister John Howard – has arrived in Cardiff to support Australia as the Ashes gets underway tonight. spotted Howard and wife Janette in deep conversation with national cricket selection boss Andrew Hilditch in the Australian team’s luxury hotel in central Cardiff.,23739,25750334-5003413,00.html

  11. So John Howard turned up at the Ashes and Showpony sent a letter.

    What is your point????

  12. Night all….

  13. Like pretty well all of your posts Neil – no point 🙂

  14. bacchus, on July 9th, 2009 at 12:42 am Said

    So you admitted your post had no point. My posts however are full of wisdom and knowledge. You are too stupid to realise this.

    as for the Ashes we are now 3/194

  15. Full of something anyway 😆

  16. Better than full of nothing

  17. Full of nothing would be misrepresenting where the PM might be or what he might be doing there; it’s the difference between a PM playing international cricket for Australia and an ex-PM sledging from the sidelines and whining about how he didn’t really get out for a golden duck in his last game of backyard cricket.

  18. LOL! Top quality bowling and fielding there. I wonder if the Australian selectors considered picking John Howard as our spinner?

  19. Sot on AI, Howard the greatest spinner Australia has ever had.

  20. “Spot” not “Sot”.

    Wake up Adrian.

  21. Kevinology

    Just how right Possum is on this one.

    Now if the right wing media and opposition can just get off the stupid extended honeymoon meme and begin on scrutinising policy along with giving alternatives/amendments then this stupid and banal attacking the man/party can cease making the government truly accountable for some of their truly terrible decisions.

  22. Mobius Ecko, on July 9th, 2009 at 10:39 am

    Yep, and it’s why the blue team needs to have a really good think about their bodyline tactics (and whoever is coaching them along those lines behind the scenes), especially when it’s impossible to disguise bodyline deliveries by chuckers using a tampered ball from the ultimate umpires these days.

  23. Howard the greatest spinner Australia has ever had.

    LOL Adrian. As a spinner he got better with age. Incredible performance indeed to be the world’s best spinner for a dozen years. Not even Warnie could match him.

  24. In the end the problem for Howard Migs was that the people could pick his googly every time. Either that or Howard had used it so often it had become his stock in trade ball, so it was easily spotted. Once that happened Howard was always going to be quickly dumped by the selectors.

  25. The last PM was not only a spinner but a ‘chucker’!

    Should have been kicked out of the game at the beginning of the century.

  26. So what was the overall assessment of the first days play?

  27. Evenly poised I reckon, if Australia don’t make a big score in their first innings they will have a battle on their hands to win the Test.

    The wicket will be a shocker to bat on last.

  28. Indeed – that is my workmates assessment too. He reckons we need a massive 1st innings score.

  29. I’m looking forward to watching Hughes bat tonight, if I fall asleep I’ll be woken up by a call from Sydney to watch.

    Hughes’ only weakness is the short ball into the ribs and I reckon that somewhere down the track he will face outside his crease to enable him to step further back and deflect the ball down his leg side.

  30. Yeah – gonna be a great night to watch. I made it to just before tea last night before I nodded off.

  31. John Boy was a brilliant bowler. I could never read his wrong ‘un when he bowled it and his flipper had everyone confused. He was a bit of a duffer in the field often confusing long off with long on. He was great to watch with the willow in his hands. No one could cover drive like John Boy.

    What a cricketer he was.

  32. I still feel the game will be drawn. I mean, they’re playing England in ‘England’. Still not a bad first day total by the poms.

    One thing I do know is: if one team wins this game and also wins the next two, they’re certain to take out the series! ( How’s that for a confident prediction!!!)

  33. Go England…Go England…Go England

  34. I’d like to apologise for my language last night. The only excuse I can possibly offer is that I was ‘overrefreshed’.

    Now, where were we? Oh yes: F**k England!

  35. I would definitely support the OZ cricket team if they’d bowl bouncers at JWH until he was a bruised & frightened mess though.

    I never cease to get a guffaw out of watching John sending down his famous duuuuuh ball. Fantastic stuff; now there’s the KING of cheesy cricket patriotism right there.

  36. Language adds tone, I like language being used to colour.

    Now where were we, I hope Australia is humiliated & the cheesily patriotic Australian media howl for Punter’s head.

  37. Australian cricket is like sneaking a quick & shameful read of New Idea.

  38. Nice HD, with such a bitter, unreasonable and uncompromising undertone, you should write the “Footy Preview!”

  39. Why thankyou Tom!

    I prefer your Footy Previews though as anything by me must be soiled by venomous contempt for Portscum. That never gets old for me but I’m sure that the more discerning probably don’t want reams of it.

    Please explain “bitter” & “unreasonable”…

  40. I note that the English tail is currently slogging OZscum out of the game; toodle pip.

    Delicious schadenfreude.

  41. Hum D, a good friend of mine who lives in Port Augusta, is what I’d call the Crow’s Supporter From Hell. He too will support any team that plays Australia.

    What is it with you guys?

  42. 400 & counting.

  43. HD, “unreasonable” applies to any opinion that is not entirely in accordance with my own, while “bitter” is sweet logic, forced down the throat of some stupid tool.

  44. I’m not analogous to him or anyone else I know miglo. I am me.

    I support Australian Fussball; just don’t like the cricket team. I realise that’s not the popular choice.

    At the end of the day it’s but a game. Screw patriotism.

  45. Tom, unpopular yes, unreasonable I don’t think so.

  46. I saw Australia’s biggest ever cheesily patriotic cricket fan in the crowd seated alongside Hyacinth.

  47. The fair thing to do would be to highlight him to the crowd on the bigscreen at the game & segue into footage of his hilarious duuuh ball.

  48. He’s already a moth to a camera lens without those little-bigman’s eyebrows earning themselves a pterodactyl’s significance, even in sport, thank-you.

  49. Good start by Flintoff after lunch.

  50. Bugger.

  51. The man on the news said England had flagging morale. Lucky I don’t like England.

  52. Ain’t cricket great!

    Poms on the ropes.

  53. And the Poms are now four down…. 😀

  54. Where’s that Pommy-loving Human Excrement Dividend when you need (to taunt) him? 😀

  55. Luckily I don’t like England Excrement (sorry I don’t know how to strike words) of Sth Yarra.


  56. Human excrement is by far the worst smelling kind of excrement outside of feline excrement. I’d far prefer to be partially covered in bovine excrement if I had the (non)choice.

    OZscum still has a few chances to choke on its arrogance; fingers crossed.

  57. Judging by the time stamps I’d suggest that I had a fairly good idea that England was rooted 2 days ago. Luckily I don’t like England, this in no way mitigates my repulsion towards the Australian Cricket Team & I look forward to overconfidence causing them to lose the next Test.

  58. HD

    I reckon England will get out of this with a draw – my contacts in the UK say that it will rain a bit later.

  59. Woo hoo, another wicket…

  60. Yes, I luv Australian Cricketers & the supremely credible English press says that they have the most superior WAGS.

    I stand corrected, Australian Cricket is not like Woman’s Day at all.

    Now I am barracking for rain in another part of the world. Lightning strikes might even cause me to have a divine epiphany.

  61. they have the most superior WAGS

    Links please 🙂

  62. lol, you mustn’t have looked at News(spews).com in the last few days kyxzil.
    Failing that check any publication of Woman’s Day, Who Weekly, New Idea or TV Week (is that even around any more?) for the last decade.

    NB, JWH is their NUMBER ONE FAN & clearly Australia’s Greatest Admirer. Everyone else may take a number.

    Here’s the link…,28383,25763875-5013560,00.html

  63. From your link HD in regard to the 2005 series,

    While the players were celebrating victory in the first Test at Lord’s, the partners had a falling out at a dinner. Morale wasn’t the same for the rest of the tour.

    Ah, I’ve always wondered why we lost that year ;-). And,

    As a result of the damaging dispute, Cricket Australia invited the WAGs to a camp on the Sunshine Coast in the lead-up to this year’s series in an attempt to aid bonding

    Game, set, and match… Australia.

  64. Go Webber – Go!

  65. England trail by 112 runs with 4 wickets in hand and 55 overs remaining

  66. F-ing awesome – Webber wins his first F! Me soooo happy!

  67. I 😥

  68. Joni, did Webber lead all the way then?

  69. No – he even got a drive thru!!!!!! And still had a clear win!

  70. And Flintoff has gone!

    What a night!

  71. Get him!! England trail by 80 runs with 3 wickets remaining.. 38 overs left

  72. ^ Get = Got

  73. England trail by 18 runs with 2 wickets remaining, 17 overs to go.


  74. Luckily I don’t like England Excrement (sorry I don’t know how to strike words) of Sth Yarra.

    My apologies, HD. I confused your dislike of the Australian cricket team with support for England’s. (No offence was intended by the struck-through word, by the way, even though it doesn’t seem at all funny when I look at it today. ;-))

  75. Don’t apologise Tony. I know humour when I see it, toilet humour is my favourite:; I have to make a massive personal effort not to use it here in every comment I leave. There should be more of it.

    I laughed when I read human excrement & I laughed more when I got to call you excrementoSY. You probably noticed that I got to sneak in a little musing about the varying increments of repulsion associated with coverage by excrement of a triumvirate of species. I really laughed.

    Then I laughed when I got up this morning & sooky punter was crying in the morning news cycle about wahwahwah it’s not fair england are bad sports etc.
    Oz cricketers are NEVER EVER bad sports as we all know, they have commodified WAGS. Anyone wouldathunk that Captain National Entitlement lost.
    Haw Haw Haw.

  76. Australia didn’t win………bwahahahahahaha

  77. Joni,

    Aren’t we having a Lord’s thread? And where’s Human Dividend? (He should be pleased at the moment.)

  78. England are off to a menacingly good start, old chap. Not good.

  79. I know Migs. I felt sure that England Crows supporter Hum D would be bragging around here somewhere.

  80. Bwahahahaha…I heard the good news on arvo shift.

    The Australian with the recent frontrunner for WAGoftheyear as a partner is being taught a bowling lesson by the smelly English.
    God save the Queen.

  81. God save the Crows.

  82. Human,

    Enjoying the cricket?

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